32 things I’m thankful for, one for every year, in no particular order

1. I’m thankful for Lolly Shea.

2. I’m thankful for my three girls, Anna Viva and Tessa

3. I’m thankful for good, good parents.

4. I’m thankful for food. Especially good food. Like stuffing.

5. I’m thankful for technology. Especially good technology. Like apps called “myfitnesspal” to help me recover from eating enough food to fertilize an entire farm. After I digest it.

6. I’m thankful for my body.

7. I’m thankful for my brain.

8. I’m thankful for cars.

9. I’m thankful for buildings, especially the house I live in.

10. I’m thankful for my clothes.

11. Plumbing.

12. Sunshine

13. Modern medicine.

14. I’m thankful for music–listening to it and participating in it.

15. Running

16. My friends

17. The fact that nobody will judge me for putting periods at the end of some of these and not at the end of others

18. God, and the profound relationship I have with Him, and the fact that he guides my life so obviously and with such love.

19. Jesus the Christ.

20. Modern revelation. And personal revelation. And the Holy Ghost. And scripture.

21. Being a therapist

22. Writing

23. Siblings. And in-laws. And other extended family who are awesome.

24. My ward. I really love my ward.

25. Facebook. I can honestly say that Facebook has changed my life.

26. My iPhone. Gosh I love my phone. So, so much.

27. People in my life who love me for who I am and accept me without reservation.

28. My journals.

29. Ice cream.

30. Prayer.

31 This blog.

32. If you are reading this, I’m thankful for you. Really truly. You. Thank you so much for reading.

Though it’s a day late, I’d love to hear something(s) you are thankful for.


  1. I'm thankful for chocolate pie, the musical talent of others, and people who boldly live out the callings and purpose of God for His glory.

  2. I'm thankful for all the twists and turns life brings us, and a loving father in heaven that guides us through them. I'm also thankful to you and your family for broadening my horizons!

  3. I'm grateful for Google. Google helped me find the hike I took today with my sister and father. Google helped me find recipe information on a new dish I made for my family; it was a hit. Google allowed me to video chat with family far away. Google helped me find a restaurant where I met some friends. Google helped me find vital information on an ancestor this week. Google and the mighty Internet help me to strengthen and contribute to some of my most treasured relationships.

  4. I'm thankful for liberals. And I'm thankful for the term "gay" because it seems so much *happier* than "same sex attraction" or "SSA" and it rolls off the tongue with fewer sylables. Who doesn't want to save time in this day and age?

    1. Ok, so that's not the only thing I'm grateful for. But I'm always grateful for when my muscles work flawlessly. And I'm not talking like, "ooh, my muscles look soo awesome." I'm more talking about when they *don't* malfunction, and they don't cramp up, and they don't cause me any pain. I have a charlie horse in my arm today, so it just reminds me that I'm still working on being grateful for things WHILE I HAVE THEM, instead of waiting until I don't have it to realize how awesome it is. Also: I'm grateful for photographers, breakfast burritos, and guns. ๐Ÿ™‚ Random, but I promise that these are all things that have to do with what I did today!

  5. I'm thankful for mashed potatoes and gravy. I'm sorry, but stuffing doesn't even hold a candle to it. Although I do like stuffing, too. Also, I'm thankful for my beautiful family, books and a rockin' iPad. Braden won't even touch an actual book now…he's too used to electronic media.

    1. The goal is no longer a complete change in orientation. We recognize that for most, that won't happen. The goal is to live in accordance with deeply held principles as handed down for our happiness by a loving Heavenly Father. After nearly 20 years of joyous (mostly) and faithful marriage, I can testify that the answer is yes, we can! I know many, many men like me, about half of whom are married, who have the same desire and are finding happiness in taking the road laid out by God.

    2. Tammy,

      Love your explanation.


      So this may not be the best conparision but I have OCD, Depression and Anxiety. I have had some therapy that was more geared towards "fixing" it which was a joke in and of itself. It made my illnesses worse and made me feel like a complete failure. Now being gay is not bad to be so don't think I am trying to insinuate that. All I am saying is trying to get "rid" of someone's "gay" is like trying to get me to fix my irreparable brain. That kind of therapy is awful, I speak from personal experience although regarding a different situation. So I am against reparative therapy with a passion. Counselor are not suppose to "fix" you, that absolutely not their role.

    3. I believe Josh wholeheartedly when he says that in his experience personally and professionally reparative therapy doesn't work. I understand how it could be extremely harmful. But if there are some people who say it worked for them, shouldn't we believe them? And if that's what they want for themselves, shouldn't we show them enough respect to let them make their own choices? Isn't that what we all want for ourselves?

      Also, if you read over the article, it's talking about WAY more than reparative therapy itself. It says "no counseling at all to reduce or eliminate or even not to act on your same-sex attractions is not permissible." Even if a client WANTS support in not acting upon SSA, therapists would not be allowed to give them that support. Basically, it's all about limiting the choices people are allowed to make for themselves. Personally, I think that is very dangerous.

      I agree with you, Maquel, that counselors are not supposed to fix you, but aren't they supposed to support you in your goals for yourself, not try to force you in a different direction because a law dictates you can no longer choose for yourself what you want for your life? Isn't it a therapist's role to support a client in their goals for their own life, whatever those goals may be?

      I realize that this is something I have very little to no experience with, so I don't claim to have all of the answers by any means, but I do think it is best to lean towards letting people choose for themselves what they want out of therapy.

    4. I have opposite sex attraction. Say I want counselling in order to be SSA, is that going to work?
      Counselling someone that they can eliminate their homosexuality is tantamount to abuse. And also, asking why a client wants that is vital – do his parents want it for him? Is he being pressured by his church?
      and again, there really is no need to worry – the Mormon Church will always be able to have in-house counsellors who can counsel as they wish.
      Where it scares the heck out of me is with someone like Ty – he's a therapist, yes? Is he a reparative therapist? Is he counselling hey, you can reduce your homosexuality? Are other gay therapists also counselling that? If they are not strictly counsellors for the Mormon Church, I think that that question NEEDS to be asked of each one of them and answered definitively. and no waffling – no, well I believe it can't be eliminated but it can be reduced.

    5. This is the American Psychological Association's official stance, adopted in 2009:
      The American Psychological Association declared Wednesday that mental health professionals should not tell gay clients they can become straight through therapy or other treatments.

      In a resolution adopted by the APAโ€™s governing council, and in an accompanying report, the association issued its most comprehensive repudiation of โ€œreparative therapyโ€ โ€“ a concept espoused by a small but persistent group of therapists, often allied with religious conservatives, who maintain gays can change.
      No solid evidence exists that such change is likely, says the resolution, adopted by a 125-4 vote. The APA said some research suggests that efforts to produce change could be harmful, inducing depression and suicidal tendencies.

      So if you are going to be a therapist in the USA under the APA, you cannot counsel that, even if the client, for whatever reason, feels that they want it. The article goes on to say that therapists can counsel abstinence in line with a client's religious beliefs, but not reparative therapy.

  6. I am grateful for my husband, religion, and family and friends foremost. I'm also thankful for this blog and the learning environment it provides. I've learned and grown a lot through it and the people I have gotten to know on here.

  7. to anon 3:41 – you will always have the right and opportunity to ruin the psyches of gay people in your ward, your city, your state and your country. God bless America.

  8. Could some people go to this guy's blog at http://onerescued.blogspot.com/ and read his last two posts "Should I Suppress the 'Gay' in Me" and "Struggling" and give him some feedback? I don't see any reader comments under most of his posts and I think he deserves some thoughtful feedback and could use some personal encouragement and support addressing some personal concerns.

    1. I was wondering why I was getting a sudden spike in readership and a few comments, finally! Thank you for being concerned about me. I'm actually doing okay, and the post "Should I Suppress the 'Gay' in Me?" was more of an invitation to others with viewpoints different from my own to share their thoughts. I don't feel that I should suppress my gay feelings, but I am working to find ways to express them and have my 'gay' needs met in a manner that allows me to be faithful to my Heavenly Father and to my wife. I love them both sooo much!

    2. I did write a supportive comment and he was appreciative. Then he said that he wasn't in conflict or struggling so I must have misunderstood him when he said basically that he is struggling and in conflict.

  9. First I am grateful for my husband and family.

    And to go off topic I was wondering if anyone know of a blog/active group for gay women who are married to men? I have been searching and haven't been able to find much of anything. Thanks!

  10. A few days late…but…I'M THANKFUL FOR YOU AND LOLLY!!! ๐Ÿ™‚ ๐Ÿ™‚ ๐Ÿ™‚ You have changed my life as I am sure you have and will continue to change many others as you open hearts and minds everywhere! ๐Ÿ™‚ Love love love you guys!

  11. I notice that you don't say you are thankful that your are gay. In fact, how do you feel about being gay? Sounds like you don't want to be gay, so you must not like it. You want to be the one who does not have a same sex attraction, and you are doing everything you can to deny it except you are willing to advertise that you are gay. The Mormon church says you are a sinner if you act on your gay state, so you do what you can to stay part of the Church and assume that if you act on it you are defective and a sinner. You are afraid to really be gay because you have been told that its a sin by your church. Just admit you are weak and cannot stand up for what you are, and that you have caved in to the Mormon church and its teachings and that the rest of the Mormons should do the same thing. Your Therapist credentials should not even be mentioned by you and you should not attempt to provide professional therapy in the area of "gay" issues. This just looks like an advertisement for Mormon sex therapy. Josh, your story still has many years to go. Most who have chosen your path have fallen on very hard times at some point in their life, usually many years later.

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