Wedding Planning

My sister-in-law Kaitlyn is getting married in May and she’s really lucky because I’m so good at wedding planning.

Like with themes. I think I’m pretty talented at choosing a theme that will tie an event together, and leave the guests thinking “whoa, that was unforgettable.”

For instance, for Kaitlyn’s wedding, I had an “Aha!” moment about a really striking theme: St. Patrick’s Day. I’m not sure what made me think of it… it just kinda “came to me” out of nowhere. When I told Kaitlyn I thought she should do a St Patrick’s day theme for the wedding everyone was in an uproar, and I think it’s because people were so excited by this idea. But Kaitlyn–who PS is of Irish descent and whose name is Kaitlyn Shea (formerly O’Shea) which is about the most Irish name you could ever imagine, and who has freckles and very fair skin–was like “I don’t think a St. Patrick theme is going to work. My wedding’s in May.”


I said, “you’re being too particular” but then she viciously Z-snapped me and said, “It’s my wedding.”

Fine. Do what you want, Kaitlyn. But if you don’t do it, you probably can’t work Lucky Charms into the event anywhere. Just sayin’.

She did concede that it was a good idea to have me help with choosing the cake.

I take this kind of thing very seriously.

I have an especially well-trained palate, most especially when it comes to anything lard-based. Or anything made primarily with sugar and fat.

I worked hard. It got a little intense.

Things started out relatively chill.
But then shiz got REAL.

And then I got ridiculous, and started using the frosting kind of like war-paint.
It was at about this point that a Hazmat team consisting of Wife and Kaitlyn came in and cleaned me up. There was a lot of yelling about “we all were supposed to try the cakes!” and “the bride should have final say in her own wedding cake, not the brother-in-law!” but the details are hazy because it was so traumatic.

Final verdict? I liked the cake with frosting.

Finally, I also offered to create a wedding invitation for Kaitlyn and Blake. There are a couple of samples I worked up, but she decided to go with a professional. She said that she really liked them though, and I have the feeling that she’s planning something special with them. Like maybe some kind of mural as you walk into the reception. I don’t know, I don’t wanna jinx anything. (crosses fingers)

Here they are:

I couldn’t get the picture in because I forgot to start with it. But you can paste it in with actual paste, and it’s no problem.
Sometimes when I finish editing a picture, I actually give myself chills.

Shhhh! Don’t tell Kaitlyn, but for an early wedding present, I’ve already started sending these off to people on her address list! How surprised will she be when she’s like “It’s time to send out my wedding invitations…” and I’m like “Actually, NO IT ISN’T! I already sent them for you! SURPRISE!!!!”

I think I feel a St. Patrick’s day hug coming on…

Peace, St. Patty’s style.


  1. I agree with your SIL, a st. patrick's day wedding is just too awesome to plan for in MAY. You would need an entire year at LEAST.
    Also if she is interested I am doing some free wedding announcement designs right now to see if I want to get into the biz, and although they aren't as sensational as the one you put up, they are free and she can see a sample if she'd like.

    The Weed has been sufficiently spammed. YES!

  2. @Kristina–Oh, you're probably right. I hadn't thought of that. I should really talk to her about maybe postponing the wedding so I have time to plan it for them… do you think it would be tacky to interrupt the wedding shower today to tell her it's been postponed??

    Oh and thanks for spamming me! My blog liked it.

    @kangaroobee–Holy cow, you just expanded my horizons–a totally ripe business venture to exploit. (clown music plays, I start juggling)

  3. I just wanted to put this out there. I know The Weed personally and I have to say that these pictures are set up. They are not, in fact, candid photos like he would like us to believe. You see, The Weed usually gets much, MUCH messier when eating cake. Thought you all should know.

  4. Okay seriously, you need to change your career path and become a graphic designer. The shamrock… the shamrock.
    AND SERIOUSLY MAN, I don't know if you meant to misspell "s'il vous plait" but it made me snort with laughter. And that's what a good blog'll do to ya.
    Well done. Well done.

  5. Wow…there are no words – except: "Reception: The same evening or the following." They could just have it twice and see which night has a better turnout. More likely that more people will come = more gifts. You're onto something.

  6. @Steven–what happens in Vegas STAYS IN VEGAS

    @math–Oh man, I don't even wanna know what you guys do with war paint. But I'm sure it's hilarious.

    @IWBY–I think it's a pretty sound policy.

    @Laura–That shamrock is my pride and joy, to use a phrase once used about a particular collection facebook photos. In addition: what the crap is s'il vous plait?

    @Ashley–Right? Yeah, Kaitlyn was getting all up in arms about the particulars like "when" "what night" "what precise location". The way I see, to more open you leave it, the more people will feel free to come as they please and not be bound by arbitary limits of time and geography such as "arriving at the correct destination". THANK YOU for getting this.

  7. @kari marie–Yeah, I ended up looking a little bit scary. I can own that.

    @Vienna–Thanks for visiting my blog! Looks like you've started blogging yourself, which is awesome. Blogging is a blast 😉

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