Well, the miracle occurred.
I kept it together. For an entire month, I didn’t miss one day. I cut it very close several times, but I was still able to do it–able to post something at least moderately substantial most days, and able to check in every single day without fail.
(In case you were wondering, I keep having the “Celebrate Good Times” dance from the first season of 30 Rock flash through my brain.)
I don’t know why this happens sometimes, but I’m seriously glad it does. Sometimes I’m able to be more consistent than ever. When it’s something I really care about, I can actually do what I want to do and meet a goal such as this. Doing this every single day was exactly what I have needed at this particular time in my life. It has been a fun, motivating, educational and therapeutic experience. I’ve processed a lot of junk, and got a lot of less-than-cool memories out in the open. And I feel that I’ve made at least a small stamp on the Internets. That maybe someone might be able to land on this site and come to know about the inattentive subtype of ADHD a little bit better.
I got a message from a friend the other day that made this whole enterprise feel very worth it. He gave me permission to share. He said:
Dude. I thought I had my particular brand of crazy pretty well figured out. Guys who have been in and out of therapy since 3rd grade tend to know their diagnoses backward and forward. After reading your blog, though, I am kinda shocked to find that a major element of my struggle has flown under my radar for a good long while now!
As a kid, I was diagnosed with ADD (nobody ever mentioned an h or an i back then- at least not to me), but when the meds we tried had no effect, we all just sort of dropped that and focused on other issues (depression, anxiety, etc). Even as an adult, I had a doctor prescribe some adderall, just to see if it could help. As with ALL my forays into psycho-pharmaceuticals, it had no effect (my chemistry just WILL NOT respond to drugs. kinda sucks.).
Anyhoo, I love your blog a) because it’s well written, and b) because it has helped me understand how huge a piece of my psychological puzzle that little sub-type really is! Holy crap! You’re telling my stories!
I just wanted you to know that I dig what you’re doing, and that at least one guy now has a better understanding of what’s going on inside because of it. You rock.
I can’t tell you how cool it is to know that talking about this stuff, even though it’s been kind of embarrassing at times, has made a difference for somebody. It gives me the motivation to plow forward, and at least take on another bite-sized goal. (April 7th, people. I can do this, right?)
And really, I feel like I do have a lot more work to do. I have more to say about a lot of things pertaining to this issue. I have another Diagnosis post I want to write, to tidy up that important step. I have visions of many things–book reviews, resources, ideas for different populations–lots of stuff. And having made it this far (doing the type of thing that so often would have ended in dismal failure long ago) makes me believe that I can make this thing what I know it can become.
And that’s really exciting.
Happy Sunday everyone.